Text for the visually impaired:
caption: cheesus loves you
picture: jesus with a beard made of swiss cheese

Sadly, Mrs. Green is not a fabrication. She was my high school algebra teacher. She was mean spirited, and superbly stupid. This moment in my history actually occurred:

Text for the visually impaired:
top caption: “Mrs. Green, the dumbest math teacher in history”
picture: a teacher talking to her student. the teacher says “Billy, if you don’t stop talking in class, I’m going to deduct a minus 4 from your participation grade.” And the student says “ummmm…. so if you’re deducting a minus 4, wouldn’t that mean you’re adding a plus 4?”

Text for the visually impaired:
caption: do not trust ducks
picture: a duck saying “naw man… quack’s not addictive if you just snort it. c’mon… just try a little”

Coming soon for the Nintendork Wee!

Text for the visually impaired:
picture: video game cover
text on video game cover: Black Friday The Game!
-get up at 4am for 7% off a crappy Chinese DVD player
-trample soccer moms and old people
-perpetuate America’s lust for more crap we don’t need
-score points for being stupid enough to think you’re getting some insane deal
-use your weemote to club other shopping morons who are in your way
-rated E for everyone

From the Turkey Cats!

Text for the visually impaired:
picture: a turkey with a cat face and tail, and a gravy bowl that looks like a cat

Text for the visually impaired:
top caption: “Satan Edits His Wikipedia Entry”
top picture: satan is sitting in front of his computer, obviously angry, and says “dangit! who keeps changing me to THIRD most evil being ever?”
lower caption: “Meanwhile, in D.C.”
lower picture: Bush and Cheney sitting around a computer, and Bush says “No Dick! I get to be #1 this time!”

Text for the visually impaired:
caption: parachute pants, when you just don’t care anymore
picture: dude in parachute pants shrugging his shoulders

NG hearts BB

Text for the visually impaired:
picture: two dudes talking, first dude says “so how’d you get on boingboing?”, second dude says “well, first i took a recycled / organic wine bottle, put some steampunk valves on it, added some LEDs, brought it to the airport, TSA thought it was a bomb so they detained me for 17 days and i caught a cold, then i wrote a book about it entirely in LOLcat, and BoingBoing posted my story!”

another transformers comic

Text for the visually impaired:
caption: International “Who Can Make the Best Classic Transformers Noise” Championship 2007
picture: crowd cheering, and a dude saying “eeeee uuhhrrrrrr ieeei uuhhh eeeeee”

Text for the visually impaired:
caption: Hippie Crunch, the new snack for hippies, by hippies. Contents: compressed cookies, soy beans, various delivery foods, and sawdust. Why sawdust, you ask? Hippies, like the caribou, have developed a unique evolutionary trait: wood digestion from spending months, sometimes years, wandering the woods on drug-crazed trips, sometimes gnawing on bark for sustenance.

Sorry we missed the comic last week…. we are uber busy with the upcoming wedding! This coming Saturday we officially will be Mr. and Mrs. Masta G

Text for the visually impaired:
top caption: when you rent an RV, don’t take classes on how to drive it, you’ll probably be ok”
picture: RV with a happy dude driving it, and on the side it says “1-800-Rent-A-Giant-Death-Machine”

In case you don’t get this, dudes who think they are ‘cool nerds’ will say the phrase “I cried when Optimus Prime died” to make girls think they are sensitive

Text for the visually impaired:
picture: two guys talking
1st guy says “i cried when optimus prime died”
2nd guy says “shut up!!! it’s not funny”